The other day I had the luxury of sitting with four very intelligent young teachers/counselors to discuss the book THE BOY WHO WAS RAISED AS A DOG. It is an excellent read and one I suggest that all educators take the time to explore. As we were talking about the book somehow the topic of self-regulation and wellness came up. While we all agreed that taking care of ourselves is exceptionally important, we also agreed that the whole idea of self care can drift towards the narcissistic. When all we think about is self, when we lose the lens of others and drift towards a more self indulgent lifestyle, are we losing who we are meant to be?
Now don’t get me wrong, I do believe that we can only help others if we are healthy. We need to ensure that not only our basic needs for safety, physical health and nutrition are all being tended to, but at the same time, we need to ask ourselves “to what end?” A narcissistic point of view might be that we make sure that we are healthy so that we can continue to partake in all the gifts that we are granted in this life. We can travel more, we can eat more delicious food and we can avail ourselves to a plethora of enjoyments. That’s likely shallow thinking and, in time, will prove just that. The happiness found here is short lived and, likely, a little hollow.
If, however, we turn toward looking at the importance of self care in the light that we use our own health to add value to the lives of others, well now we’re on to something! If we recognize that in being “well”, we have the ability and stamina to contribute to the world, to be more Christ like, that’s the place where wellness shifts from the narcissistic to the divine. The mantra “I need to be well, so I can contribute fully to the wellness of the community.” makes great sense to me.
So, when you head out to the gym, I know I didn’t get this buff from eating doughnuts (stop snickering), rather than thinking about how the good sweat will help you be more attractive, try to frame it in the sense that it will give you prolonged energy to help those who need. it. When you go to get your next massage, ask yourself, how does the more relaxed me benefit the kids in my care? When you have a nice meal out, ask yourself how this meal gives you the positive frame of mind you need to be a positive role model in the life of your family. The framing matters. You matter. You make a difference in the lives of others.
When we put our own health in the light of the ability to assist others, we shine a little brighter and we do God’s work. That’s what we’re called to do. So, like I’ve said in the past – take care of yourselves! It’s important that you are well. Others need you – all of you – the best you!
Take care of yourself people! Do it so that you can care for the most important of community members, the children. Be well to do good in the world!
Keep on learning – and be well!
Dave
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